David P. Crews
A few years ago when I was yet fully Christian in my beliefs, I wrote the following sentiment on a card and posted it in my home:
"I would rather know a fearful truth than remain deceived by comforting falsehoods."
I was quite sincere in that desire to know the real truth, but little did I fathom the journey I would soon take, nor did I anticipate in the least the nature of the truths that would be revealed to someone who actually sought them. The things I learned would take me on an amazing journey from a traditional Christian belief structure to a new, surprising, and far broader understanding of human history and endeavor - a view that can only include Christianity and its God as part of a large collection of sibling myths, connected to far older ideas and beliefs that stretch back into the mists of ancient human society.
I can only partially share this journey with you here, but my sojourn would take a man devoted to Christianity and the God of the Bible and set him down unceremoniously in the simple dirt of Earth with nothing of his familiar mental world left to comfort him. It took some time to turn myself from fear and grief and finally begin to rebuild a life of peace and of true joy.
This is a voyage others have also taken, and although our pathways and the views we have gained may differ in some ways, it is the journeying that matters, along with the principal of shedding our illusions. These illusions have not only bound us, but in many real ways defined us prior to that search for truth.
This is not an easy road. The words "fearful", "shocking", and "surprising" are frequently applied when one's personal paradigms of religion and philosophy of life are challenged and changed. We must learn to deal with our fears by examining them and talking about them. This, too, is part of the passage.
I approach this project with some trepidation, for I had much invested in my prior philosophy of things. I am still on my journey. Perhaps, you are also going down this road. If so, you may find comfort or helpful insights from someone else travelling this way. Perhaps this is my "ministry" now - to present my thoughts and experiences and ask you to respond in kind - for I hope to learn from you as well.
I have said that we have been bound and defined by our past illusions. The task at hand is to redefine ourselves and our purpose in this life. Not a purpose or a definition imposed from outside ourselves, but rather one developed and nurtured by us. This becomes truly joyful when we realize that we are unbound, awake, and limited only by our own fears.
- David P. Crews
If We See No God Before Us
we see no God before us,
compass then shall we assume
god's mighty river,
we see no god before us,
time! The time.
we lost in the echoes
time enough for us
- Nov. 1999, David P. Crews
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